I’m a woman and I write nasty, cruel, humiliation, torture erotica about unfortunate victimized women. Many assume I’m a dominant. The fact: all the submissive victims in my tales are all me. The victims are always me, even if they’re a teen, slim or male. But their psyches are very much my own. They are all flawed, masochistic creatures with suppressed needs to be punished, humiliated and sexed. They all have an “inner slut”—and in my stories, this is always forced to the light.
Punishment, torture, humiliation and forced sex acts are the central spine in my porn tales. Why I like such things, I am not sure. I am not a psychologist; someone more qualified would have to explain it. But, there are plenty of villains… cruel soldiers, sadistic men, prison guards, corrupt cops, pirates and backwoods primitives in my stories forcing women to do disgusting things.
My heroines seem to crave sexual humiliation. Sometimes they are whipped or subjected to torture first. Eventually they are raped and sodomized. Occasionally they are coerced into extremely degrading acts like bestiality. More than their bodies, it is their minds and souls which are raped.
Older men say I am voluptuous and rubenesque. But I know that most guys like girls who are twenty, tall and slim. That’s not me. I was a tomboy when I was young. Then around ten, I became a ‘girly’ girl, interested in dolls, clothes, make-up and boys.
As far as sex was concerned, my libido was always turbocharged. I must have a lot of testosterone as I began to masturbate when I was only seven. But, I discovered early on that no one wants a girl with a high sex drive or too interested in sex. If she is highly sexed, then her value as a potential mate and mother suffers in the mind of society.
Here is the key to what makes me tick. Like so many key pieces to people, it is to be found in childhood. An older male cousin would sometimes wrestle me to the ground and hold me down to spit saliva into my mouth. I hated and loved him. But when I was a kid I found this treatment excited me. And then when I was eleven and on the way home from school a group of boys began teasing me in a sexual way about my breasts, just starting to develop. At one point, the oldest grabbed me by the arm and told me I was a little slut. And he would punish me for it. Then he let me go.
I used to daydream that he took me and made me do ‘bad things’. This is what drives my fantasies…
Email: shabbadew2002@talbotpress.com
